Oh, joy.
by Luna Moth
Summary: A day in the life of Dark Star when he was but 15...


Time: 11:05 AM Date: June 18, 1996  
  
*Thump* Dark Star groaned, he'd rolled out of bed again. He heard laughter from the all. Dark Heart. Oh, joy. He hauled himself off the floor, rubbing his eyes. His stomache lurched and he ran for the bathroom, spilling what was in his stomache. The joy it was to drink, hurl the next day. After wiping his face, he left the bathroom and went downstairs, only to be sent back up by his mother to get dressed. Oh, joy again. Dark Heart was still laughing. Walking back into the kitchen, Dark Star heard the last bit of the story of the night before. He turned to leave again, only to be stopped by his father. He cringed. Oh, joy, yet again. He turned around, only to get a lecture on not drinking under age. Then he was shooed off.  
  
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Time: 2:00 PM  
  
Dark Star walked down the street, hooves in his pockets. Nothing like his first day looking around Starlight Hollow. *Wam* He ran into someone and fell on his ass, hard. He glared at the pony he'd run into. "Watch where the hell you're going!!" "Me?! Watch where YOU'RE going!!" Oh, great, an argument. Dark Star got a good look at the pony he was arguing with. And fell silent abrubtly. Thought in his mind: Someone pinch me, it's a hippy angel from heaven! Thought in her mind: I MUST SAVE THOSE APPLES!! Dark Star got up and held out his hoof. "Sorry, I should have been paying more attention your rack... I mean where I was going!!" The other pony looked appalled, refusing his hoof. "Why, you god damned PIG!!" *Whack* Dark Star had a burgundy mark on his face shaped like the hoof of the other pony. Oh, joy. The pony shoved past him and ran off. Dark Star just gaped after her, then sighed. Meet a hot filly, and get a smack on the face. Oh, double joy.  
  
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Time: 3:00 PM  
  
Dark Star walked down a neighborhood street, then tripped over something and fell on his face with a hard smack. He rolled over and looked at the screaming child. A peg, yay. Suddenly, a yellow peg with multi colored hair came charging at him, weilding a thorny staff. Dark Star scrambled up and ran away screaming. Oh, joy. *Wham* He ran into ANOTHER pony. Another peg, whoohoo. He crashed to the sidewalk, on his ass again. And then the yellow peg was standing over him, looking miighty pissed. Dark Star scrambled back, aparently afraid. "Look, lady, I never meant to make your kid cry!!" And then the 'hippy angel from heaven' walked up. She glared at Dark Star. "Oh, look, the god damned PIG." The yellow peg looked at the white and blue unicorn, raising an eyebrow. "And you mean this WHY?" "Worst line I ever heard, he said he should have been paying more attention to my rack!" She made a disgusted face. Dark Star meeped, scrambling back even more, bumping into the screaming purple peg. The yellow peg walked up to him, looking very mad. Dark Star just about pissed himself, he was so scared. Wait, no, he DID piss himself. And this made the screaming kid go from tears of pain to tears and laughter. The peg Dark Star had run into started laughing, and the unicorn... She gaped, then ran up to the house they were in front of, laughing. As for the yellow peg... She pointed the staff right at Dark Star's... Friend is a good word. He paled and scrambled up, running for his life and the safety of his manhood.  
  
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Time: 5:00 PM  
  
Dark Star walked down an alley, wanting to avoid all of the ponies that seemed to be out to get him. He came across a dog, with foam on its mouth. Forget oh joy, how bout oh crap?! Dark Star backed up, eyes wide. The dog growled, but didn't move. Then a cat dropped down onto him, hissing and tearing at his face. Oh, joy. He got the cat off, face now bleeding. A less rabid dog stepped out from behind a dumpster, growling. Dark Star meeped, then took off out of the alley, dog in hot pursuit. He crashed through a bunch of crates of apples and oranges, slipping and falling to one knee. He yelped, then scrambled up to try and run away still. The dog caught up, ripping his pants and pulling at his shirt. He kicked the dog off, scrambling up despite the screaming pain in his knee, running off.  
  
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Time: 8:00 PM  
  
*Pantpant* Dark Star leaned against a wall, sweating like he never had. If he thought PE was bad, it was heaven compared to THIS. He'd escaped a pack of dogs that had torn his jacket to shreads, torn off all but his sleeves on his shirt, and reduced his pants to shorts. Oh, joy. He turned to leave the wall, just to run into yet another pony. He looked. Oh, great, another unicorn who was white. This time, her hair was rainbow. He groaned. The unicorn kicked him where it hurt, then walked off. Dark Star groaned, curling up, in pain. Then the dogs came. Oh, joy.  
  
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Time: 9:00 PM  
  
Dark Star walked into the house, battered, bruised, and cut. Nova turned around and dropped the plate she was holding, gaping at her oldest son. She rushed over, motherly consern on her face. "Dark Star, what happened?" Dark Star gave her a pained look. "Bad day. First I run into a hippy and say the wrong thing and get slapped. Then I trip over some kid, and his mother nearly castrates me. THEN I run into a peg, adn it turns out the kid's mother was the mother of the hippy, and she tells her mother what I said, and again I'm nearly castrated. Then I piss myself, and run away. I walk into an alley to get away from them all, and a cat attacks my face and a dog chases me out! It riped my pants and shirt, I banged my knee, and in the end, a pack of dogs ripped my clothes off, save for ONE THING!!! AFTER some girl with rainbow hair kicks me where it hurts!! That is what happened!" Nova hugged her son, then sent him to the livingroom. "Stay there and I'll get you something." She left, and Leo walked in. "Dark Star, take out the trash." Dark Star gaped at his father, then fainted, falling to his side on the couch. Nova walked in with some hot soup. She blinked. "Gee, after all that happened, he must be exausted..." Leo blinked as well. "All I did was tell him to take out the trash..." Oh, joy. 


End file.
